I just gathered up a pile of post-its and other bits of paper on my floor. on these papers are about a year's worth of lyric scraps and random lines. some are used in songs, some appear more than once. some were not on paper and i typed them on my phone instead. some are based on me and some are totally in character. some are cool sounding and some are stupid and cheesy.
i am consolidating them here. at this point, most have dates on them. the order will be roughly most recent to oldest, starting with late 2011- early 2012 (present) and going back to whenever i uploaded the last one. here we go.

3/21
your hand will hold mine
but your voice will not requite me
why does it feel like
you always fight me

4/? (mid april)
you want to drown in soda pop fame
you'll drink up the bubbles and think it's champagne
while the high fructose corn syrup seeps in your brain
eats away at your mind
in sweet processed bliss
and you want to die this way
tangled in fame's kiss

2/27
fit in, don't let 'em see you care
lend your conscience, lend your hair

cut and dye
cut-and-dry
got new shoes i hope you're gonna keep 'em tied

straight face
cheap lace
know your poses
know your
-- place!

2/28
[first line goes here- i never wrote one]
in these luminescent headlights i find you prettier than moonlight
the rearview mirrors are cameras whose feeds all show up on the dashboard
hey man we need a dash of something 'cause we're so bored...
sobered...

nothing is a let out
nothing is a let out
nothing is a let out
oh-oh...

/no date/
just movie kisses
those hollow-woods
talk with their teeth

1/14
you like to send me vicarious travel
and i long
for closer than company
the sound of your voice
running rings round the sun

2/26
i owe you a lot for all the music
i owe you a lot for the times i fought you
i owe you the fact that i wasn't alone
why are you still here?
what have i done?

3/5
i wanna rip you out of my system
count all the chances- you missed 'em
giving me emotions
i got the orders, hate the mission

it seems you never learn
it seems you never learn

burn!

your words burn me out.
get off my mouth.

1/17
if you got a color we demand a million shades
drip-wax seals and caustic marinades
in the midst of politics and people screaming
poetry rises without a meaning

3/20
you think the things i do
the talking feels like new
you listen when i ask you to

safety pin my shadow to your arms
so i can go there
seal away these secrets in a box
no one has to know where

3/20
I've been known for shooting mirrors
no one wants to hold my fingers

all your pretty dresses
won't make me a little lady
i'm a bad motherfcker
I'M A GUNPOWDER BABY

1/22
she saw him shortly after he got hurt
warnings and dirt
no shame
morning advances
dirt morning advances
taking chances
seems profane

3/17
you're looking for and like me

3/17
I thought that i was gone from you forever
and you as part of me were all but severed
i was sad that we were not together
but them we traveled time and were recovered

again i notice all those things
22s and hearing trains
it's great to have you back again

2/9
shut your mouth story and tell your brain waves
they cannot come and live in my ears

there's no place
there is no time
there's no place for you
place for you here

2/26
open wide
shy outside
Jeck'll hide
from the world

2/21
and i will pray
for every last one of you

1/25
this is a 911 to everyone
this thing has got to stop
[this monster's got to stop]

I could be the warm
lightning to your storm

1/28
dressed to the nines
for the tens and elevens
you're rich as hell
cause you spent all your heaven

1/30-31
daily dose of stupid juice
look who made the tv noose
sell yourself and sign the truce
where's your right to choose?

1/27
now she withers and wishes she'd known
she'd have to die to free her bones

12/29
wordless and worthless

3/9
pester rain won't go
won't leave me alone
and i can hear the water
shaking in my ears
i can see the water
shaking in my eyes
i can taste the water
shaking in my mouth
i can feel the water shaking in my blood
going to quench dry bones
the water
the water

3/10
hold my veins away from me
hold my veins against me
stain of restrain
as i strain to restrain
as i strain to contain

3/10
under all the pressure
of everything you know
the pressure is relieved now
feels like you let me go

under the impression
you're mine to throw around
i only wanted to hold you
and you let me down

3/10
smarter made me shrug
and safer made me prone
and older made me smug
and smug made me alone

3/17
the one i heard
was only words
found out you lied
and since then i
take back my smiles
you lying child
the one i kissed
does not exist

3/7
recurrences of my old self
wolf as i were
as soon as i smelled spring
as soon as i smelled spring

i am not
the same loon
nor are you
the old you
and nothing that i thought
was true.

2/6
raze the curtain for the final bow

2/2
bleeding and bleeding
on knives of the mind

2/10
a kiss to shut the door for good
a kiss that this will never be

thoughts in the dark
holding knives to my mind

2/10
hole in my jeans on the thigh from my thumb
it'd be the latest fashion if it weren't the only one

and i cry out
to the sellouts

cause the setters know best
trendsetters know best

wait my heart out
cardboard cutout

transcending their best, la mode
just waiting for their suns to set

and explode

1/15
what i said was in the past is still around

/no date- probably late 2011/
-losing daylight and my mind
-catch my breath and a glimpse of the sun
-out of bed and time
-waiting tables and patiently
-change of season and clothes

1/31
a day so fine
caught myself standing in line
it was my turn
i took it for the worse
i meant it

the means that bring the ends
it all depends on what you're looking at

/no date- based on an older line/
this is not the place where you were born
this is not the calm before the storm
this is not a riot, this is the norm

it's a big world, you'll grow into it

12/25
we missed half the 90s before we were born
we missed half the 90s when we were alive
we are the babies who live in the past
we are the babies of nineteen-nine-five

winter's too cold but i'm plenty warm
and dying for more
trip on my tongue
kissing nineteen-nine-four

love and bleach and fire and gasoline
and screams and other things
of which we used to sing

i wish too much
can't find... can't find my mind

i'm a jaded old fuck and i wish i looked at music the same

2/25
smile for the camera
shot in the head
develop the pictures
lookin good good as dead

1/27
head will roll
to the soles in control
cold races to places, mistaken
plastic sarcastic
bashing the masses, tactics
TV static
no one knows how tragic
no one knows how tragic

you must be miss taken
sorry, my mistake

try to make amends
sever what offends

1/2
we are equal in these times
we are equal in these crimes
we are equal draw no lines
we are equal in our brine

what's in yours is what's in mine

head first in the media
just another stolen face
just another stolen place

swallowing your poison whole

just another slowin' pace

we're krill in the baleen of fame

chew and swallow stolen shame

1/1
i'm so fuckin bored and lazy
my stuff is all over the floor but maybe
i could clear a place
where we'd lie side by side and waste
a couple days
lost in vinyl haze
no "their"s no "they"s

1/2
a heart you never asked for in your hands
and what that heart demands

1/2
fuck you
calculater
piss off
smell u later

/no date/
dodging in and out of traffic
and each other's lives

/no date- 2011/
none of this is real
you're just a lie i tell myself

12/26
I said never mind
never mind
never mind
said whatever you do don't mind

5/26/11
kick it for sleeping

i like the crunch
i'm chewing up my mouth

prostrate ourselves
to RUMORS

11/26
[not typing the accents cause i'm lazy]
passe simple
l'enfance etait simple
nous n'avions pas une chance
taisez-vous
tout a coup
vos reves perdent leur romance
hey hey
cyclones lie in the eyes of the water
cyclones lie in the eyes of the water
cyclones lie in the eyes of the water
woah, woah, woah

read past simple
childhood was simple
we never had a chance
behave yourself
and all of a sudden
your dreams lose their romance
hey hey
les cyclones restent
dans les yeux de l'eau
les cyclones restent
dans les yeux de l'eau
les cyclones restent
dans les yeux de l'eau
whoa, whoa, whoa

11/20-21-22?
there was a time, young ones,
when life was a dream-sky,
supple and simple,
childhood was cake

we knew we had playthings
and daydreams for chasing
but not that they'd rot
into maggot-meat, quickly replaced

flicking bombs at Mother Riot
seeded boom in Riot's womb
started naming generations
started taking too much room

12/11
let's get famous and die in the blinding lights

we'll say he was our pretty little friend
we'll wait until he's dead and gone
and get to know him them

/no date- summer/
suffocated hockey
sister in a spray can

/no date/
i only feel like myself
when i'm by myself
i feel i only like myself
when i'm with someone else

11/15
bubble child, bubble child
inside her shell her mind runs wild
walls of concrete, writing in the grout
she sees mirrors but doesn't see out

i let no one in
i let no one in
i let no one in
staring at my skin, myopia
[tearing through my skin, myopia]

/no date/
are you sure you love the ones
who are laughing at your pain
you are a chain
and they will break you down
you are a flame
and they will burn you out
you oughta change
or else they'll push
until you cave
you are so brave

you're human in his arms
but are you human in his head

you're human in his arms
is it humid in his head

/no date 2011/
swallow your doubt
i hope you choke
close but no cigar, you shouldn't smoke
watch your step,
too close you'll go blind
you should learn to read between the lines

/no date summer 2011/
just picked a scab out of my ear
i think it's somewhere in my hair
and then i remembered
why the fuck should i care

i kinda really have to pee
i perform my functions bodily
they still go on
even if no one cares about me

terrestrial boredom

/no date/
the emptiness is draining
like all the light you're wasting
you're drooling and complaining
there's no spark

china cracks in broken plates
like watching milk evaporate
in the dark

/no date/
hello it's nice to meet you
i'm hungry but i think i'l feed you
blind and i would like to lead you
don't forget the ones who freed you
(someday they just might need you)

12/29
this is the dress i wore today
it doesn't smell like you and
its seams so black and blue and
i run the scizzors through and
the scentless dress is ruined

/no date summer 2011/
you were a child all rosy and pink
had screwed ideas of how things work
a library of libel just waiting to stink
you developed nervous quirks
all grown up and out of work
i'll stab you in the gut you jerk

/no date summer 2011/
the glue is busy fixing sneakers
you can wear your heart on your sleeve but not your feet

i like that thing adorning you
i would like to wear one too

11/27
trust your eyes to censor mirrors
trust the mind to make you care
trust the others in their wisdom
trust your own dead stare

11/28
i'm just your typical whiny-ass teen
with a big fat vain ego but no self-esteem
i can play a few chords
i get pissed when i'm bored
deep down all i want is to be adored
i'm lazy
high school sucks
rule #1, don't give a

/no date these are almost all 2011/
cry me into the sea
of dancing bodies

crowd energy

/no date/
count your possessions
counter obsession

you're in over your sick head

/no date/
DRIVE YOUR SHOES

/no date/
i don't have your dead ghost heart
why do you make things feel like it

you promised me love
is it lost in the mail?

blue eyes you could fall in love with

/no date/
you seem to know the stories behind these things

/no date/
i know you don't care for me
that i'm just her effigy
i know someday you'll see
you miss your chance with everyone

you always tell me all your dreams
you love like i'm projector screens
the naked canvas for your slide machine

/no date spring 2011/
factories bottline purified air
while spewing their smoke to the sky

/no date/
your mind doesn't rule very well
and your body rebels

/no date/
of you want to free the freed from freedom
turn up the TV proceeding to feed 'em

i've been writing love songs behind your back

/no date/
you remember things were so much better
in the decade before you were born

i wouldn't make my world so loud
if i didn't have so much to drown out of my system

you and me
forever in our infamy

/no date/
love feeds on milk
and valentine candy
she feeds on [flowers/roses/petals]
and an artist's [starving/beating/bleeding] heart

quick and painless
stolen stainless

/no date march 2011/
a cloud floats high above the ground
someday we will shoot it down

i'll probably end up with
someone like you

/no date summer 2011/
i'll take your hand
i'll run you dry
i'll whisper to you
whisper baby
"don't you love the lie?"

/no date/
behaviour and instinct
naked on the inside

/no date spring 2011/
you're my perfect
you're my pretty

someday this will
speak to you

i want you
to myself

FUCK EVERYTHING
TAKE ME BACK TO THERAPY

oops

/no date summer 2011/
you'll censor her thorns
so her love doesn't hurt
this girl is a flower
she'll die without dirt

it's war on the papers
the movers and shakers

/no date/
you only love me in your dreams

/no date/
dead laughter tele

/no date/
i was an idiot child
bent on chasing cliches

and now i have no answers
for the questions you raise

and the lies you shake

off the wall-
phone call

/no date/
sometimes i feel like old gum on the sidewalk-
used up and no longer wanted

i wanna be different just like everyone else

she was born into royalty
out of heaven in a hole

/no date/
who knows where they begin and end
always loved you as a friend

/no date/
collective subconsious
a black-and-white photograph
we looked at the flag
and we all saw red

/no date/
i wish we had our whole lives to do this, but we don't.
we have rationed hours in the afternoon and we need
to hurry or else we'll never get it done in time.

/no date march 2011/
i slept like it was summer
and i dreamed [like/til] i was dead

i can't stand no knowing how the story ends
it's true we'd make a good pair
but we're even better friends
i only love you cause i can't control my brain

i'm scared of spit
and i'm a hypocrite
and i hate you
cause you're one too

/no date/
i wonder if i'm nauseous
i really can't tell

deleterious,
man I'm serious!

i'm intemperate

laughing off the awkward tension

can you tell what i'm thinking?
oh please don't tell

/no date spring 2011/
you only go to places to say you've been

everyone's a freak

/no date/
teach us well for now, the year
and if their money doesn't want him here
he'll go away to live in mountains
"daddy what's a water fountain?"

trickle, trickle
hurrikeynesians

8/4-or-5/2011
31 hours today
lumbar bumps
and a glass of champagne
time flies on a plane
...time flies on a plane
they tell you how much time remains

like the games we played as children
where everything can be solved by building more guns

i may be loud
but i'm no punk
i just like safety pins
and all sorts of useless junk

recline
and don't mind

i'll see them all from first to lost

/no date/
are ya tuned

/no date/
i'd cry if i could

i know you can't take the stress
i love you but i'm a mess

if this isn't real then where's your objection?

i slept through friday afternoon

/no date/
state of matter
fusion
fission
fuck amusement
fuck decision

/no date/
museum sleeper

/no date/
optic love

so close to here
so unaware

would you like a kiss goodbye?

'Lyn believes in me

/no date/
sin of envy
soaked in her fat cells

dull advantage

/no date/
i am made of flesh,
you are made of zeroes and ones.
is that true?
[quote from cleverbot]

i held the computer as she shut down
emitting a warmth for us to share

/no date/
beasts of change

11/1
you left without a word
you had me for desert

11/2
last year wasted my december
doting on my dear dissembler
now i choose not to remember
now i choose not to remember

/no date/
air thick with sparks

you'll fall in love with anyone
as long as you have got no chance

i'm in love and you're a ghost

you think you're so mighty,
might as well

i know it's not
your fate to rot
cause baby nothing's settled

queen of arcs and angles

out looking for birds will never
get you very far
just jack white's look-alike
sitting in the woods with a guitar

/no date/
cuts and bruises
[hearts and roses/dying muses]
nothing left to run from

game-bored

indie-cision

fantasies of mind control
and sex and drugs and rock and roll

/no date/
you're old enough to read a map
depeche-toi and mind the gap
be careful not to overlap
with oncoming trains

you've got all night, you've got no right
you've got a week
i think you're old enought to keep
that trigger finger on your lap
you're screaming out your brain

it's-not-o-k

freedom for oil and dogs chewing tin foil
it's painless at best
spilling ice from a hole in my chest

you were right about me and i'm wearing a wire
don't worry it'll all end well
but i'll kill anyone you tell

my heart my head
play dumb play dead

i want to be the girl who
always sings in the hallway
i want the apathy
to curb my indecision

i want to speak
and feel no remorse for speaking
i want to be the girl with a dark secret

notice me

there are pills for everything
there are pills for everything

/no date/
no soul, you're all just numbers
digits on the counter
culture
's hand

go against the grain
but go against the same grain
keep different names
but have the same brain
operate as you were trained

/no date/
circle in a square half

/no date/
i got struck by lightning
walking home in the rain
and i saw the future with my own brain
i died young, but older than i thought
but enough about me and all the things i bought

the government had total control
and they were holding a funeral for rock n roll

/no date/
barb wire eyes
piss-warm smile

/no date/
look at me
your stare
cold glare
your
pair o' lies
real eyes

/no date/
my tongue
my head
play dumb
play dead

lay down
lay low
my town
my ghosts

/no date/
mirror mirror diamond ring
you know we'll have our fun

i'll kiss you when i think i'm pretty,
shoot you when i'm done

/no date/
i wanted to learn the ropes and be a big shot record producer

save me computer science
just like you've saved and killed us all
the human race got dumb
i'll save my friends and then blast off to space
i'm done

track 6
track 6
make me

/no date/
the taste of pennies on my tongue
watching the future eat its young
[i'm pretty sure my dad wrote at least the first line of that.
the second one might have been mine i don't remember]

/no date/ [these are cool but i don't remember writing them]
rats and stones
you stroke my bones
ice cream cone
i drip alone

pray tell, what would you like to be, sir?
a champion disgracer?
a monkey deceaser?

embryonic scars
welcome, my children

/no date/
leave me be, i'm no forgiver
i will have these scars forever

this is not a riot,
this is the norm

/no date/
i'm a hated figure but i have no regrets
i'll melt all the glass in the television sets
[my dad wrote the first line, i wrote the second one]

/no date/
you taught me that sometimes your children come home
and you don't have to be madly in love with every album you own
and you taught me that sometimes wounds heal without scars
and you taught me not everyone travels in cars
and dust doesn't have to gather on the shelves
and sometimes we must remember to love ourselves
in a world that's just bursting with personal hells

/no date/
just saw lightning
but i don't hear rain

/no date/
a man who believes he can hide behind wealth
he'll say there's no heaven
he'll say there's no health

/no date/
i don't have to wonder because i know

/no date/
they tell you it takes brains to stay,
it takes guts to drop out

it's never my turn is it

10/12
bare hands in the garden
calling to his falcon
sailing on his galleon
til he fell off the horizon

11/9
deep down i fear it's getting cold
and i just want another warm body to hold

get off my mouth

12/10
can i hold you
and feel your lungs laugh?

burn diary
notice the color
your past in combustion

/no date fall 2011/
i'll do to you
what you are to me

FOOD MAKES MOOD

ther's no stopping human nature
tell that to the legislature

/no date/
were you sleepy on your wedding day?
did you ever see it coming?

/no date/
apocalypse kiss
think of situations
but not yet
not while there is consequence

9/26
"Headless Barb"

happy birthday, here's a Headless Barb
dressed in her garbage manufactured garb
teach the little girls to starve
all dolls are beautiful
some dolls are carved

wear a wire, Headless Barb
tear my childhood leave your scars
princesses have plastic parts
live in pink houses and drive pink cars

be like her and end up dead
got a hollow malleable head
all her organs cannot fit
never eats and never shits

/no date/
you held your tongue now spare me mine
you [had/missed] your chance a lot of times
I'll make the list another time

tall candles cry, burn down

i said something wrong, who hasn't?

somebody pissed in the gene pool

yesterday somebody drowned

/no date/
i can't fix it: myself

change the shit world

/no date/
i understand the things i say
may come across as such cliches
but i adore the way you walk
even when you walk away

and i don't know how well you know me yet
or if you'd even want me
girl you got me in a quandry
i'm in love

/no date august 2011/
i'll tell you when it's time to dance
i'l be your clock with swallowed hands

/no date/
haven't picked it up since but i got real close
i got breakfast cereal brains and my tongue is toast
i'm all mixed up the clear is coast
are you gonna leave me?

10:02
i'll call you
in 20 minutes
but by then
i'll be pissed again
anger's my bad habit

/no date/ [not a lyric but it's a thought i wrote down]
That glorious moment when you've been staring into space, paused, searching for the right word, and suddenly, it appears, snatched out of the air, and clicks into place like a puzzle piece.

/no date/
always real polite to strangers
i act shitty toward my friends
soft embryo of an idea
i ate all my brainchildren

/no date/
burping shirt

/no date summer 2011/
how's your new plaything?
are you bored with her yet?
she believes in you this time
how soon we forget
is she after your money?
are you after her debt?
would you cut her some slack?
you think you're a tinker
and you're turning a key in her back

you want a diamond
you want it rough
it's always the same
and it's never enough

/no date/
it hurts so that i won't fuck up again
but now the pain comes even when
i've done nothing wrong

i'd never try
to take another's place
i'll leave you alone
just get out of my face
a smile is ugly
and so i am, your grace

/no date summer 2011/
i look better hiding in my clothes
where no one goes
no one
cares
wear and
tear
no one
dares
stop and
stare
no one

/no date/
i'm falling down the stairs

/no date/ [prose thingy]
you can't demand the respect they'd give an adult if you're going to overreact and throw a tantrum like a 5 year old child
you can't be arrogant and condescending and expect them to like you.
let me tell you something, princess. you live in the real world with real people, not the world in your sick head.
and someday there will be a situation you can't sweet-talk your way out of, and reality will hit you like a ton of bricks to the balls.

11/17
elle adore danser
mais pas quand on regarde

/no date/ [prose thingy kinda goes with the other one]
you won't always have a system of sugar coated rules to protect you, and despite what you'd like to think, you're not that great at lying to cover your tracks. you don't have perfect control of yourself, and denying your flaws doesn't make them disappear.

/no date/
i didn't let it go

it could mean something

i love you when you're not around
can't stand you when you are

you won't love me but you'll stroke my fingernails

planes flying over my house then yours
we feel too safe at this day in age

falling for someone
you think that you choose?
i tried so hard not to

can i ask you something unrelated?

it spreads like dandelions on fire
and i am last to know

dance with me in my living room

hope you enjoyed that,
cause i'll overthink it and i might not wake

i can't picture anyone with you
like i can't picture anyone with me

adding years to her collection
isn't this enough? she asks

you are a replyless fool

yes i'd hold you in my arms
yes i'd kiss that stupid face
i'd swear you to secrecy anyday
i'm not desperate, fact i hate the taste

/no date/
spent you on a conversation
hey hey they wait you out
you're the king of sere-nation
hey hey they wait me out

we listen for planes and trains in the dark

i sit in my ball pit basement
she's in love with the world

can i sleep now?

got a mind full of cities and 600 friends

replace the other muses that were living in my head
one of them is dead to me
the other one's (just) dead

11/11/11
start off my day with a massive blood sugar spike...

enough with the sadistic shreiking
do you enjoy inflicting pain on other people's ears?
does it make you happy?
there are other human beings here

...I hope a walrus crushes you :3


--------------------
a song i wrote on notebook paper 2/24

"Don't Know Me"

in your mind you think
that it would do no harm
to make me dress up
just to wear on your arm
weeks and months
of false-alarm
demands and shaking hands

you don't know me at all
you don't know me at all
you don't know me at all
you don't know me at all

and i don't know you

cellphone bruise and razor glint
a year ago you told me i can' take a hint- ha!
you're the one who doesn't get it
               -forget it

you don't know me at all
you don't know me at all
you don't know me at all
you don't know me at all

and i don't know you

[guitar solo or something]

you don't know me at all
you don't know me at all
you don't know me at all
you don't know me at all

and i don't know you